“The most important thing was the dog”

Released, delivered:

Do you remember that feeling of emptiness when he or she pronounces finality? However, ruptures, if they can appear insurmountable, always teach us. Dropped, released recounts those moments in life when it was a question of reinventing oneself to live an even more beautiful life.

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Françoise is 52 years old when her husband of more than 25 years decides to leave her: “This breakup, I did not see it coming. I think I told myself that he would never dare. I have always sacrificed everything for him. I worked for his company for free, I took care of the house and then the children. I chose to have only a part-time job to manage to do all this. Naively, I thought that “He would never get by without me. I didn’t expect him to find another woman to do it.”

Her ex-husband leaves her no choice: “I had to leave the house, he wouldn’t let me take what I wanted, and above all I had to leave the dog to him. The most important thing was the dog. He didn’t I didn’t care that I was attached to it too. We could have organized joint custody like for the children. But that was out of the question for him. I went to battle with my lawyer to have my rights recognized. only because I thought he had crossed the line with the dog. And I did well.”

Video. “At 30, the father of my children left me and went to the end of the world”

A welcome recognition

After more than a year of conciliation with her lawyer, Françoise obtained recognition of the work she had previously provided to her ex-husband: “I obtained a compensatory allowance. I did not think that justice would make a move for me. I had gotten used to being the culprit or the one who didn’t measure up. Judgment changed everything for me because I realized that I had a place and that I deserved those things. The kids decided to stay with me and I kept the dog. My ex-husband didn’t want to bother after all, when he realized that nobody was on his side. He just started his life again, with another woman.”

Françoise is happier now: “It took a while but I got through it. In fact, this relationship hadn’t worked for a long time and I could have made the decision to end everything on my own. But I don’t I didn’t trust myself at all and I was afraid of losing everything, starting with my children. Now they’ve all left home, but I still have a very good relationship with them. The dog is still there. I don’t I didn’t want to get back together because I need to spend time with myself, for myself.”

Françoise begins therapy

After the separation, she also started therapy: “I’ve been separated for a little over 2 years now and it helped me a lot to be accompanied by a psychologist. I didn’t know where I was after I had spent more than a quarter of my life worrying about someone else’s happiness, almost never thinking about my own. or which films I preferred. I had integrated the tastes of my ex-husband and it was my daily reference. The therapy helped me to see things more clearly and also to reflect on the reasons which made me I’m thrown into the relationship like that. It’s also thanks to the therapy that I know that I want to be alone now. I deserved some time for me.”

Video. “No, celibacy is not an anomaly”

Françoise is happy today: “I have the feeling that a lot of time was wasted but I can’t totally blame myself for having been in a relationship with this man for so long because it gave me two sons. whom I adore and who are not at all like their father. I have done everything to ensure that they are respectful companions and we talk a lot together, which allows me to check on a daily basis that they are on the right track. Me, I learned to do things for me. I go to the cinema, I sometimes go to the restaurant alone. After the separation, I asked for my job to become full-time and I got it. I did it to be financially secure but it brought me a lot of fulfillment. I was sad about it all, I cried for hours. But it was worth it. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere somewhere else now. I have a good life.”

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