Does it really teach you anything to say that cat owners are fat vikoss? Certainly. And as many of us are part of this fragmented community, we have identified all the objects destroyed by this cute animal, including our self-esteem.
1. Your sofa armrests
First he started ruining it by scratching his claws on it, then he kept going, pissing on it too, until that couch was just a mountain of pestilential fumes.
2. Your flip flops
I’m not lying to you, I have proof:
3. That sweater you forgot on the bed
And which is now covered with an intense layer of hair. Even with the machine you won’t be able to catch it, the best thing is still to try to sell it on Vinted by highlighting the “vintage hairy” side which may be able to seduce some fetishists.
4. Your headphones
If you’ve never had your headphone wires eaten by his cat, it’s because you’ve never had a cat or he’s stuffed or you think he’s been a cat from the start then that in fact it’s just a big rock.
5. Your tax return
Or any sheet of paper lying around because you don’t care but it’s not made to be eaten.
6. Your butter
By dint of licking it as soon as it falls on it, there is more risk of consuming again this fatty matter which has been in regular contact with his tongue, even though it has also been in contact with his ass.
7. Your plants
If the plant is tall, he will poop in it. If it is small, he will knock it down. If it’s appetizing, he’ll just eat it and potentially die, because most houseplants are poisonous to your cat.
8. Your couple
Since he sleeps between you two, taking up half the bed, it goes without saying that our sexuality has taken a hit. Especially since your cat is now the only one looking at you naked in the shower with this desire that you haven’t detected in your partner’s eyes for a long time.
9. Your tapestry
Opt preferably for exposed stones.
10. Your forearm
Since you have been living with your cat, several liters of blood no longer flow through your veins.
11. The belt of your bathrobe
Or anything that dangles.
12. The corners of your pillowcases
By sucking them lustfully.
13. Your dog
He’s 17 times her size but he’s clearly the one being mugged.
14. Your curtains
The best is still to have shutters. I assure you it can be very scary to see them at work:
15. All seagrass materials
That said, the question begs to be asked: what the hell are you doing with seagrass in your house? Do you know that just because you have seagrass at home doesn’t mean you’re at sea?
16. Your bouquet of dried flowers
I have just discovered that many people around me have an unhealthy passion for this type of object which, in my opinion, symbolizes the total absence of joie de vivre and a pronounced taste for Katherine Pancol’s books. Even if the charming colors and the comforting aroma that emanates from it act like a gentle caress on my soul and it is not impossible that I will end up joining this deviant community.
17. This little knitted sweater
And no, it’s not a quibble.
18. This Vase
By dint of jumping like a caïd he ended up winning his case: knocking down this precious object inherited from your grandmother.